We are now moved into Billy's house and it is going well. We have enough room and it's relaxed. Collin's room is bigger so he has plenty of room to play. This is going to help us pay off a lot of stuff so we are really excited about that.
My job is going ok. I'm having a bit of difficulty learning the system, but it will come in time.
Garner started clinicals this past Monday and seems to be fine so far. He will be scrubbing in next week, so he is nervous about that.
I need prayer. I get down a a lot because I'm away from Collin so much now. I hate that someone else gets to spend more time with him than I do. I know I'm not a bad Mom because he goes to a sitter, but it sure does feel like it. Then when we get home in the afternoon, he's cranky. We are home around 4:30 and he goes to bed around 7 or 7:30. This schedule just sucks. Why could I have not been blessed enough to get to stay home with my child? I don't "blame" Garner, which he thinks I do. It's just our situation right now. I am having a hard time accepting our "situation" though, especially since I had such a great schedule at PTS. I don't want to not work at all. I think it's healthy for Mother and Child to have time away from each other and with other people, I just want more time than what I have now. Anyway, it's hard to make Garner understand how I feel as a Mom. I know he loves Collin as much as I do, but face it, Dad's just don't have the same attachment/connection with their children as Mother's do. He does not see the time away as a big deal like I do. Plus, I think all the changes that have taken place this month have made me more susceptible to being in a bad mood. I seem to be easily irritated a lot lately. I keep telling myself that Garner will be working again soon and then maybe I can cut back my hours. I know God has a plan...I just need prayer to get over this slump.